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December 17, 2003 #
 One of the four "Featured Profiles" on Love.com's debut preview. Q: Did A&F pay for this spot? One love is so this is love is killing me talk pretty one day at a time for our love... Yes, love is pretty and love is confusing but mainly love is really fucked-up. Thankfully AOL is here to make sense of it all by launching Love.com, in preview. In the past couple days AIM members have been receiving emails (an assumption since I did) promoting a revolutionary new way of meeting people called...online personals!? Holy Mother of Crapness. Does it ever end and doesn't AOL already have a million chat rooms by topic (with people who presumably share the same interests) for this? The marketing copy boasts "hook up instantly!" and "if you're on you're in!" and "discover someone new!" The first one, which either reeks of a college snow day or a night at The Hole, is enticing but unless the Yellow Running Man can deliver a warm body to my door in under 30 minutes then I'll just stick to the tired and truly deceptive method of getting drunk in bars. The second selling point seems like it should be reversed or at least revised to say, "if you're on top, you're in it!" Obviously, the third is just trying to court the "church singles" demo. There's simply too much easy stuff to pick at on the actual site. It's practically bent over and begging for comment. I am guessing stoned interns wrote the profiles because they can't possibly be passing these off as real. Example, from Glad2Bhere: Last great book I read War and Peace....wow that was a long one! (uh-huh) Best or worst lie I've ever told i once told i guy i couldn't sleep with him because every time i have sex with strangers i wet my pants. that is by FAR the worst lie i've ever told. LOL (you don't say?) Folks, I speak from experience when I say it is best to avoid online dating altogether unless you want a collection of awkward evenings that at best will only provide something to write about. I've tried the Nerve, the Friendster, and the JDate but the best results to date have been the Hit on a Co-Worker. Really, that's all you have going for you at this point and if you've run through everyone including the hygienically-challenged office manager's assistant then you better get a new job. Krucoff.com's "The Other Page" powered by Removable Hype. The information contained in this web site is subject to change without objection. Copyright © 2003 La Otra Página, Inc. All nights observed. |
